Tuesday, February 10, 2009

So is that where my time went?

I watch A LOT of movies. This is no joke, and you're soon going to realize that as I'm about to make a list of my movies from January 2009. The good, the bad, and the excellently bad are all going to be included. I'll briefly summarize the plot (and by "I" I mean http://www.imdb.com/ because I'm lazy. I wrote the Bride Wars summary, and will just be copying and pasting the rest of the summaries) and then tell you how I felt about it. This is in order of viewing, not preference:

(I apologize ahead of time that this list has no pictures. For some odd reason, I'm having trouble getting the pictures to go on this post.)

1 - Bride Wars (3.5/5 stars)
Bride Wars is a romantic comedy starring Anne Hathaway and Kate Hudson. In the movie, their two characters have been best friends for many, many years, and have shared one common goal in life: to get married at the Plaza in June. The plan was for them to be each other's bridesmaids, but then the weddings were accidently booked for the same date. This comedy follows the two as they fight for the selected time...

I personally enjoyed this movie a lot. If you want something serious or deep, you're in the wrong place, but this movie is perfect for girls' night. I laughed a lot, and the end was very touching (even if predictable).

2 - Win a Date With Tad Hamilton (4/5 Stars)
"Rosalee Futch is a grocery clerk living in rural West Virginia. But even a small-town girl can have big dreams, and Rosalee's is to someday--somehow--meet her big-screen idol Tad Hamilton. The somehow arrives in the form of a contest--the grand prize: a date with Tad Hamilton--and the someday is now. Rosalee wins, much to the chagrin of her best friend and co-worker Pete, who is deeply, hopelessly--and secretly--in love with Rosalee. The Win a Date contest was cooked up by Tad's agent, Richard Levy, and his manager, also named Richard Levy, to clean up Tad's bad-boy image. Someone should have told them to be careful what you wish for. When Tad meets Rosalee and gets a taste of what he's been missing in the real world, he decides he wants seconds and moves to West Virginia, turning Rosalee's dream come true into a nightmare for Richard Levy, Richard Levy and, most of all, Pete"
Okay, this movie made the 14-yr-old girl in me just squeal non-stop. The truth is, when I go to see romantic comedies, I go in with the mindset I had at the age 14, before the world taught me about guys and how much of a let down they could be compared to the men in movies. So, while watching movies, I don't think to myself "that'll never happen..." but instead "ooooohhhh-emmm-geeeee!!!!!" So yeah, I loved it!

3 - Misery (5/5 Stars)
"Best-selling novelist Paul Sheldon is on his way home from his Colorado hideaway after completing his latest book, when he crashes his car in a freak blizzard. Paul is critically injured, but is rescued by former nurse Annie Wilkes, Paul's "number one fan", who takes Paul back to her remote house in the mountains (without bothering to tell anybody). Unfortunately for Paul, Annie is also a headcase. When she discovers that Paul has killed off the heroine in her favorite novels, her reaction leaves Paul shattered (literally)"
Stephen King is a genius, basically. And Kathy Bates is an amazing actress. This movie is a MUST-SEE! The end has you screaming at the TV - cursing crazy Annie and rooting for Sheldon. I refer to this movie in everyday conversation now, because it's just that epic...

4 - Wrong Turn (4/5 Stars)
"Chris Finn (Desmond Harrington) is on his way to a job interview and is driving through the mountains of West Virginia. There is then a chemical spill on the road, so being short on time, he decides to take a different route, an abandoned dirt road in the middle of nowhere. He then by accident crashes into a car sitting in the middle of the road. He then meets a group of friends on a hiking trip who include Jessie (Eliza Dushku) whom where stranded on the road. Two people stay at the car, and another group goes for help, only to find a sinister cabin nesteled in the West Virgina woods, that is home to a trio of cannibalistic mountain men horribly disfigured from years of in-breeding. They then make a mad dash for their lives through out the woods, only hoping to make it out alive"
Omg, it was predictbe but amazing. I was screaming quite a bit during this one if I remember correctly... I want to see the second on, but haven't gotten to it (mainly, I'm scared it won't be as great). Lots of gore, plenty of jumps, a few moments of extreme frustration with the stupidity of the characters... All perfect bits to a beautiful horror movie

5 - April Fool's Day (3/5 Stars) -the one from 1986
I'm writing this summary because the person on imbd kind of hints at the end, which isn't cool... Muffy St John, an heiress, invites 9 follow friends to her mansion on a secluded island. Slowly each guest starts dying off one by one...
This one wasn't very scary, and they made it seem as if you knew the killer. The end was lackluster and slightly disappointing. Yet somehow, I enjoyed this movie quite a bit... I guess the best way to put it is to say that this movie is forgettable. I believe they remade it, and I wonder sometimes if that one is possibly better. If it is, I want to see it. The thing I find troublesome is that most people seem to enjoy it. Maybe I was less able to enjoy it because I spent most of the movie comparing it to the Agatha Christia great "And Then There Were None" which is far, far better (both the movie and the book are worth reading/seeing. The endings of both are different, which was actually quite nice for me. I got suprised twice!).

6 - Sweet Insanity (0.5/5 Stars)
I'm also writing this summary, because the one on imbd is as misleading as the cover for this movie. Highschool Senior Stacey meets a weird new girl who has a troubled pas. The friendship quickly escalates to obsession when the new girl tells Stacey all of her friends are not good for Stacey. When Stacey's parents leave town, she has a party and people start being murdered. Who did it? And who will live?
O.M.G. I would never watch this again, but I'm kind of glad I did in the first place, if only because my friend and I made fun of it the entire way through. First off, I have seen highschool productions with better acting. The transitions were awkward and well, everything was awkward... Through this movie, I realized the importance of music in movies. It sets the tone. This movies tone was NEVER properly set. The filming quality was of the highschool variety also. I expect to have some sort of suspenseful unease during a slasher flick - I never did feel nervous for the characters. Of course, I knew it's be bad in the first 10 minutes, when Stacey's mom announces she bought Stacey's dad a chainsaw for his birthday and was going to hide it behind the tool bench, and the camera did a dramatic view of the tool bench. Also, this movie horribly misrepresents a psychological disorder which I happen to know quite a bit about thanks to my interest in it following Mary Higgins Clark's "All Around the Town" (a great book, highly suggest anything by her if you want suspense).

7 - Superbad (4/5 Stars)
"Seth and Evan are best friends, inseparable, navigating the last weeks of high school. Usually shunned by the popular kids, Seth and Evan luck into an invitation to a party, and spend a long day, with the help of their nerdy friend Fogell, trying to score enough alcohol to lubricate the party and inebriate two girls, Jules and Becca, so they can kick-start their sex lives and go off to college with a summer full of experience and new skills. Their quest is complicated by Fogell's falling in with two inept cops who both slow and assist the plan. "
Okay, I've seen this movie like 4 times now, and it never gets old. Call me a frat-boy at heart, but I love it. It's got enough gross, sick, rounchy humor to keep me laughing and quoting for hours. Two of my roommates hadn't seen it yet, which shocked me because they're the ones who turned me into the crude human being I am today. They also loved it, as I knew they would. This is also the movie that made me fall in love with Michael Cera. he can literally do no wrong now.

8 - The Young, the Gay, and the Restless (2/5 Stars)
This is a spoof! I know it sounds like a porno, but yeah, it's a spoof...
"An aging, wealthy diva, Ms. Victoria Gaylord, in her late 50's learns that she has a mysterious illness and will soon be dead. Her family, friends, and entourage gather at her fabulous estate to assist her during this time of ill health. Some of these guests are loyal while others are vultures creeping their way into Ms. Gaylord's finances"
Okay, this really wasn't too bad. I'm generally a fan of spoofs and this one disappointed me, which is why it got so few stars. I did end up quoting this one afterwards though, but it had some funny parts. I would quote them, but then I'd be giving some parts away, which would suck if you wanted to watch this sucky movie... I'm just going to throw this out there - this spoof doesn't leave a part of soap operas untouched with murder, vengeful scorned people, hated family, adultry, a love child, and anything else you would request of your favorite gasp-worthy soap.

9 - The Cabinet of Doctor Caligari (4/5 Stars)
Oh for pity, IMBD does not have a good summary for this one either... In this silent film (made around 1920) Dr Caligari is a traveling hypnotist. He has a Sonambulist (sleep-walker) who can supposedly predict the future. At night though, the Sonanbulist leaves his babinet and commits murder. One man in town attempts to catch this beast

Okay, I was going to give this one a lower star count and then I thought about when it was made. This film was one of the first of it's kind. It produces an amazing twist ending, which many other movies today take from (and which has now been way overused). I can definitely appreciate this film for what it is - a historical masterpiece.

10 - Notorious (4.5/5 Stars)
"The story of Christopher Wallace (aka Biggie Smalls). Through raw talent and sheer determination, Wallace transforms himself from Brooklyn street hustler (once selling crack to pregnant women) to one of the greatest rappers of all time; THE NOTORIOUS B.I.G. Follow his meteoric rise to fame and his refusal to succumb to expectations - redefining our notion of "The American Dream." "
Okay, I'm not going to lie - I went to see this without even knowing who Biggie Smalls was aside from a South Park episode spoof. I left the theater crying. It was THAT good. Actually, if you know anything about the history of Biggie Smalls, you'll know the ending is sad. How coud it be anything else? But this film was excellent! The filming makes you feel as if he is a close friend, someone whose sucess and life you feel personally involved in. My main complaint is that the actors they picked didn't really look like the people they were supposed to be. It took me quite a long time to figure out that P. Diddy was P. Diddy and who Lil Kim was... It would have helped if they looked more similar, but I can see how that may have been difficult to achieve.

11 - The Godfather (3.5/5 Stars)
"Vito Corleone is the aging don (head) of the Corleone Mafia Family. His youngest son Michael has returned from WWII just in time to see the wedding of Connie Corleone (Michael's sister) to Carlo Rizzi. All of Michael's family is involved with the Mafia, but Michael just wants to live a normal life. Drug dealer Virgil Sollozzo is looking for Mafia Families to offer him protection in exchange for a profit of the drug money. He approaches Don Corleone about it, but, much against the advice of the Don's lawyer Tom Hagen, the Don is morally against the use of drugs, and turns down the offer. This does not please Sollozzo, who has the Don shot down by some of his hit men. The Don barely survives, which leads his son Michael to begin a violent mob war against Sollozzo and tears the Corleone family apart"

Okay, This wasn't as epically good as I thought it'd be, but I've been assured that Godfather 3 is the best. I plan on watching them all eventually. I enjoyed this still though. Sadly, I don't have much else to say about it... except that it's a classic movie and for that reason alone, I saw it.

12 - One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest (3/5 Stars)
"McMurphy, a man with several assault convictions to his name, finds himself in jail once again. This time, the charge is statutory rape when it turns out that his girlfriend had lied about being eighteen, and was, in fact, fifteen (or, as McMurphy puts it, "fifteen going on thirty-five"). Rather than spend his time in jail, he convinces the guards that he's crazy enough to need psychiatric care and is sent to a hospital. He fits in frighteningly well, and his different point of view actually begins to cause some of the patients to progress. Nurse Ratched becomes his personal cross to bear as his resistance to the hospital routine gets on her nerves"

First off, Jack Nicholson was a beautiful man when he was younger. Wow. But yeah, This was a good movie. I feel as if I didn't appreciate it as much as I could have because the DVD skipped, and I was unable to view the climax. Also, I feel as if this movie would have been a MILLION times better if I had read the book first. My friend who had read it was watching with me and couldn't understand why I didn't positively hate the nurse... Maybe I'll try watching it again (with a non-scratched DVD) after reading the novel.

13 - My Bloody Valentine (2/5 Stars)
"Tom returns to his hometown on the tenth anniversary of the Valentine's night massacre that claimed the lives of 22 people. Instead of a homecoming, however, Tom finds himself suspected of committing the murders, and it seems like his old flame is the only one will believes he's innocent"
OKay, the 3D effects were amazing. Besides that, this film was horrible. I've heard some people say they liked it and have been trying to figure out why... The end was not predictable, which was cool. But they failed at suspense and terror. I screamed solely because there was something literally flying at me (yay 3D!). At one point, everyone in the theater laughed - and it wasn't supposed to be a funny part. If you want 3D, save you money for the upcoming Coraline in 3D, which sounds awesome...

14 - Deliverance (2/5 Stars)
"On a weekend canoeing trip down a river in the Georgia back country, four urban businessmen enter a nightmare in which both nature and mankind conspire to send them through a crucible of danger and degradation in which their lives and perhaps even their souls are put at horrendous risk"

I had so much hope for this, and it really had some potential, but it fell short. Lewis was TOO thoughtful: "Nature changes a man, man does not change nature..." It was just too much for me. According to my mom, when Deliverance came out it was very shocking because it shows a man being raped. I think it relied heavily on that shock value. It is another movie I feel was probably an excellent book because there were concepts that can't be brought across well on screen. The plot was the sort that I feel is meant to make you consider yourself, your morals, and how you can change through experience and fear.

15 - Hard Candy (1.5/5 Stars)
"A mature 14-year old girl meets a charming 32-year old photographer on the Internet. Suspecting that he is a pedophile, she goes to his home in an attempt to expose him"
Okay, this sounded like it would be really good and had a lot of awards and critic reviews backing it. Plus it had Sandra Oh and Ellen Page. I thought I'd love it... No! It was weird, unrealistic, and just weird. Oh, and Sandra Oh is only in the movie for like 1 minute. False advertising!!! But mainly, it was just weird. I wasn't a fan. The acting was good though.

16 - About Schmidt (4/5 Stars)
"Warren Schmidt is forced to deal with an ambiguous future as he enters retirement. Soon after, his wife passes away and he must come to terms with his daughter's marriage to a man he does not care for and the failure that his life has become"

God, this movie was depressing, but sooo good. I wanted to cry the entire time. My favorite part is how Schmidt writes totally inappropriate letters to a 6-yr-old child in Africa who he sponsors. It's the funny part that lifts the mainly depressing mood of this film. I feel as if everyone should be warned about this: You see Kathy Bates naked. Now that you're warned- go see it!

Well, there we are. All the movies I saw in the month of January. Be excited for February - I've already watched seven movies! The list should be shorter, because not only is the month shorter, but I have more homework to take care of and less time to watch movies. Boo...

No comments:

Post a Comment